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Protecting children from personal disputes after divorce

The first year or so after a divorce may be the most difficult as former partners struggle to maintain a sense of balance and stability for their children while finding their own footing. While communication with an ex-spouse may be emotionally exhausting, it is also crucial to establishing the tone for co-parenting for years to come. Louisiana couples may be unable to avoid disputes as they move past the settlement, but psychologists advise them to be aware of how their actions affect their children.

It has been noted that negative comments and insults directed at each other may also be taken personally by their children. Parents who feel the need to vent about their former spouses are advised to do so in privacy, perhaps with a therapist, so children do not feel more conflicted than they are. It is also recommended that parents create an environment that does not place children in the middle of adversarial situations. One example might be questioning or quizzing them about the time they spend at their other parent’s house.

When a parent has moved on from the divorce, this may include starting a new relationship. Psychologists advise parents to be prudent about when to introduce that person to their children. There is no way to know when an appropriate time may be since children mature and adapt at various rates. Many divorced parents postpone that chapter in their lives perhaps because they also must adapt; focusing on the formation, discipline and love of the children is of primary importance to them.

The decisions and agreements on which a Louisiana couple settles in a divorce may need revisiting as time passes. As children grow and each parent’s relationships and circumstances change, the need for modification of a court order may arise. New disagreements regarding child custody or support may need to be addressed. Having an attorney to assist one in these situations may ensure the disputes are resolved quickly and fairly.

Source:, “The 7 commandments of parenting post-divorce“, Claire Gillespie, Jan. 15, 2017

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