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Why you should (almost) stop ranting about your divorce

We frequently write about the importance of processing any negative emotions you may experience as a result of your divorce. Having these emotions is completely normal and healthy. But if you fail to process them appropriately, you may impact your ability to obtain a fair divorce settlement, to receive the kinds of child custody arrangements that are truly in the best interests of your child(ren) and your wellbeing.

One of the ways in which some individuals process negative emotions is to write or speak about them repeatedly. There is something cathartic about repeating your thoughts until you can make more sense out of them or until they do not seem so pressing. As a result, “ranting” can be a healthy way to process emotions. But ranting is only healthy in certain contexts and to a certain point.

If you are ranting to yourself and the universe while taking long walks alone, this is okay. You are alienating no one and impacting your divorce process in no way by clearing your head in this manner. Similarly, if you are ranting to a private journal, you are harming no one and are not in any way going to affect your divorce process.

However, if you rant on social media or if you continually rant to members of your support system, you risk alienating some of your greatest assets and you risk impacting your divorce process. If you need to rant, try to do so alone with your thoughts. Otherwise you may compromise your future by trying, in this way, to make sense of your present and your past.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Don't Send It -- Three Reasons Why,” Tracy Schorn, Oct. 6, 2014

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